I had the chance to work with our church’s youth pastor on this video that was shown at the youth service this past Sunday. The absolute worst part of this project was getting the footage down at the beaches. By the water, it smelled absolutely horrendous. I mean it was gag-reflex moldy-urine aged-bottled-flatulence nasty air. And some people were walking in the water and enjoying the beach. The students were fantastic and went with the flow. They talked about their most fun and most spiritual memories of the past year. Enjoy!

Last Friday, we spent some good quality time with the Wong family… the Lon-Yvonne-Stellar Wong family. It’s been a long time since we’ve sat down together and talked about anything and everything. Those types of conversations are really important for a person like me, and connecting with friends is an energy booster for Serena. We are a very social family even though I go through seasons of isolation. It’s this strange cycle of being-around-people to being-away from people that I’ve begun to understand more in the past year. Why do I like being around people? I see myself in different ways and I learn more about how I relate to myself. Let me explain.

Lon took this photo of my hairy leg. People point out this fact to me regularly and quickly make reference to my equally hairy armpits. I used to get embarrassed about it but over the years I’ve accepted that this is how God made me.

The next thing is around my body language. I knew that I use my hands a lot when I’m explaining something but I’ve rarely considered the inconsistencies between what my mouth and body are saying. In this book that I mentioned that I’m reading, I am making a more solid connection between emotional responses and physical reactions. For instance, we all have physical reactions when feeling fear. These reactions have common threads whether the fear is sourced from a physical threat or emotional threat. And understanding this helps to read others and especially oneself. I can’t remember what I was saying in these photos (probably related to something techy) but it’s interesting to consider what my body is saying.

Flash photography is a skill I really stink at. And I’ve read so much stuff on forums and websites that I am more confused and frustrated. I do realize that I need to “do” more in order to “be” more (that’s a Christian truth, ehh?) and I’m just my worst enemy in planning self-improvement.

At Hubert and Angela’s wedding, my friend Andre and I talked about flash photography and in order to demonstrate what effect positioning the flash head makes, I took these shots. Which of the following goes with the photo: pointed straight ahead; pointed straight up; pointed up and away

a.

b.

c.

I’ve been inspired to understand love relationships on a different level. For as long as I could remember, relationships have intrigued me. From an analytical perspective, how do two people find each other in the crowd of billions? Why do they make the decision to get married despite the chances of separation and divorce? What is the rationale behind our reactions and coping mechanisms? At one time I had thought about a career in counseling but I soon realized that I should be in the other chair… hopefully you understand what I meant by that.

My best friend is a therapist and recommended I read this book. To be honest, I have felt and still experience the sensation of being lost in some relationships. If you’re wondering what that’s like, it’s sort of mixture of anxiety, hopelessness, and frustrated fear. For example, a form of that “lost” feeling is when you’d say something like “I don’t know where we stand.” And there’s this tentative state where a million different possible outcomes overwhelm you into indifference sometimes.

I’ve said it before and its worth repeating: marriage isn’t simple and easy. And now I extend that statement to pretty much all relationships. For example, the other day I decided to confront a co-worker about their attitude and since then, nothing has changed so I at a loss of what to do next. As a result of my relationship woes, I confess that I’m not very good at them. And before reading this book, I attributed my suckiness to poor boundaries. Now I realize that the root cause of that is a layer of insecurity. Connect the dots and you’ll see that that lost feeling is triggered by this deep-set emotional instability.

I can recall an incident as a kid when for a few minutes I couldn’t find my mom and dad while in the toy department at the mall. This wave of panic stuck me right in my gut/crotch area and my expectations of going home for dinner and sleeping in my bed were threatened. I didn’t know where to go or who to turn to. I froze. Overwhelmed, I started to cry but held back all I could to prevent myself from losing it altogether.

What I’m discovering through this book is what patterns I repeat and why I do what I do. Digging deep, I’m taking steps to change what I can in order to be a better husband, son, brother, and friend. More on this later…

I’ve been a bit too busy to process all the photos from the G.A.P. but surprisingly I took more video clips. The other day I was wondering whether it is a “dream” of photographers to be picked up by a magazine or advertising firm. The budgets would be higher I assume and of course the pay per shoot would be nice. I think my friend Vlast could sell some of the photos he’s taken around the world. And I know that original art is something I have a strong interest in.

Whenever you walk downtown, it’s easy to get caught up in the marketing. Images are everywhere and the message of the majority of the billboards is that you need this product to be happier with your plain life. But one common ad that I raise an eyebrow to comes from the lingerie companies. And I honestly don’t know what women think of when they see these advertisements for products bought by mostly women. Or am I totally out to lunch in believing that men buy lingerie more than women?!?

I do get disappointed at the messages these ads send out. Does it promote a healthy lifestyle? Does it honour women? Does it honour men? Does it positively contribute to your self-esteem? Where does it encourage your mind to go? Either way, I don’t like them. The only thing amusing is watching the reactions from other people as they walk by it.

If you’ve been following some of the comments from yesterday’s post, here is the video that Jen took. After watching it, you might know why I was not posting it right away… but it’s actually a cool angle. Nice work, Jen!

You be the judge. Some of these are really funny. Comments are welcome!!

This past Saturday was Hubert and Angela’s wedding. I had the chance to capture their day on video and was it ever a blast. There were a lot of constraints at the church so using the steadicam wasn’t an option unfortunately. But this had me focusing on being more creative with my 5DmkII. Serena was using the XH-A1 in a constant position while I moved around more strategically. This is definitely where being artistic would’ve paid off. I’m too into the tools and gadgets that I’ve been neglecting developing my artsy side.

A few weekends ago I was at a BBQ and the two of them were there. They are quite the cute couple and if they have kids, I foresee them being very driven individuals. Plus they’ll be short. Nonetheless, I asked them at the BBQ how they were feeling about the wedding day and all that planning coming to a conclusion. Of course, back then they were somewhat tentative and a little anxious. They looked fine to me:

Hubert and I got to know each other pretty well in University. I used to drive him to campus really early in the morning and we’d talk about a lot of stuff. I’m glad we still have a good friendship where we can talk about everything. He’s a really good guy and if I were a student in one of his classes, I’d probably feel like he was a cool friend. It was refreshing to see him tie the knot at his wedding. He is a very sensitive individual, and to see the two of them fulfill a lifelong dream, it had me smiling a lot through the endless Chinese food at the reception.

When asked what he would do if there was a UFC fight on his wedding night, I got this look: priceless

Back in June, I had the chance to be the official photographer for my friends Steve & Michelle. It was the 3rd time this year that I got to take on this huge task and I was armed with my 5DmkII and 50D cameras. I don’t have all the lenses that a proper wedding photographer should have but I think I am beginning to develop the eye, especially when it comes to composition. The tricky thing for me is to try and make what I see in my head a reality. I tend to get too caught up in the technical side of exposure and bokeh (Japanese word, look it up). When I look at the blogs of photographers I obsessively follow, I am constantly impressed with their creativity.

Here I tried to capture this girl snapping frames with her imaginary camera. In the second before I grabbed this shot, her hands were in a better position as if to click the shutter button. I had the darnedest time playing with my camera settings and missed it…

My new “BFF” Claudia has quite the talent for catching split-second expressions. And I tried to get some of that by focusing on hugs… because we all need a hug. Disclosure: my hugs aren’t free because of the recession.

Michelle’s siblings are quite funny to watch. So I tried to coach them (another skill photographers do well but I don’t) to have some fun in this next photo. If you’re looking for a wedding photographer, their personality and character are huge things to consider apart from pricing.

The flowergirl was fantastic throughout the day. Thankfully, Michelle set this photo up and I just had to snap away. Serena thought this was really cute so I added a little vignetting (which annoys me).

And I won’t say much more about the remaining photos except that I have quite a lot of respect for professional photographers. I know of a good handful of young guys and gals starting off in the industry and can’t imagine the opportunities they’ll have.

For the last photo, this is where what I saw in my head didn’t match up to what was taken by the camera. I’m sure that if I could do some photoshopping, it would turn out a lot better. But as the saying goes, practice makes perfect…

A couple of years ago I travelled to South Carolina and had the chance to visit the BMW museum there. It was pretty cool to see so many different models under the same roof. If I could afford it, I would build my own showroom of the many vehicles I have owned. That would be something cool. What I found amazing was how BMW’s quest to build the ultimate driving machine was reflected in the evolution of their vehicles over the decades.

What is it about cars that have me all excited? I heard Jay Leno say something profound that has me wondering whether it would work with my wife. On Top Gear, he was asked why he has such a huge car collection. He responded something like his wife appreciates that he returns home smelling like oil with grease on him than perfume with lipstick on his collar. Being in show business and staying with the same woman is quite an accomplishment. He loves his wife. He loves his cars. I can’t begin to fathom how much money is spent on cars.

There are few people in this world that can stay faithful to their wife. And this might be a reflection of how faithful they stay to their goals. I have found that we change our minds too often. We give up on things too soon. This quest to live the ultimate life is somewhere out there but we just can’t figure it out.

There is a line in one of my favourite movies “The Last Samurai” where, referring to the Japanese culture, Tom Cruise says “They devote themselves to the perfection of whatever they do.” I agree with that and still ponder where that obsession and devotion comes from. And it drives me bonkers trying to figure out where and when I lost that drive. Moreover, how do I get it back?